August 2011
1 post
Hello tumblr.!
I’m back. Okay, deep breath. One. Two. Three.
HELLOOOOOOOOOOO Helloooooo Helloooooo helloooo hellooo*
*Echoing through the canyon of my wasted time.
February 2011
3 posts
I Hate the Shocks!
Think about how many times you turned on a light and how many times you turned off a light today. So many times you can’t even remember? Now think, what if you are punished every time you turn a light on or off? Now you understand my life in my carpeted apartment.
Also every time my husband and I kiss each other.
Ashton Kutcher, No Strings Attached →
ronenreblogs:
annaaamaayorrr:
I was shooting a scene in my new film, No Strings Attached, in which I say to Natalie Portman,
“If you miss me. you can’t text, you can’t email, you can’t post it on my Facebook wall. If you really miss me, you come and see me.”
I began to think of all of the billions of intimate exchanges sent daily via fingers and screens, bouncing between satellites and...
Harlequin Novels
My grandparents are the cutest ever. EVER. They’re moving out of Williamsburg, where they were both born and raised; where they met, married, and have lived always. Now they want to sell my grandmother’s collection of thousands of romance paperbacks. The books still look brand new. Let me know if you want them and how many (and if you want any serieses or just a few randomly...
January 2011
5 posts
Uch, Be Gone
When we get a big snowstorm and it’s so cold and snowy and everything is still I am reminded of the time I got stuck at a friend’s dorm during a snowstorm in December 2002 and was so hungry but there was no food and I was anorexic then anyway but I was just so hungry that I picked all the raisins out of a box of raisin bran. For two days that was my biggest meal. The dorms were...
They Look So Weird and Childlike
I know I have small hands because I used to play piano (not well) and because I wear a 5.5 shoe BUT then my husband said something about my hands being freakishly small and now it’s weird but every time I notice my hands I see them as being freakishly small. This is weird. Is there a support group for this? I feel weird about my hands.
I'm a Nerd
This morning on Squawk on the Street Erin Burnett mentioned Haagen Daz and the British guy filling in for Mark Haines said, “actually Haagen Daz is British, I think” and Erin said, “oh, I didn’t know that.” And I said to the TV, “actually Haagen Daz was started by a mom-and-pop team of Jewish immigrants in the Bronx who made up the words Haagen Daz.” And...
(And also a husband, mother-in-law, father-in-law,...
My nephew turns 3 today. Happy birthday Noah!
I can’t believe that within one year I went from not being an aunt to getting two nephews and a niece. Life, for all its idiosyncrasies, knows how to deliver.
Aunt Aline is Awesome
My great-great-great aunt is on Facebook and my internet browser doesn’t recognize Facebook as a word.
December 2010
6 posts
Spooky
I just finished watched “What Ever Happened to Baby Jane?” and I’m freaked out of my mind. Holy crap freaked.
My Eclipse
Last night the Earth eclipsed the full moon and my husband I were here to see it. I slept fitfully from 12 to 2:05 and then startled myself awake afraid I’d miss it. So we bundled up and headed out and stood on the driveway to look up at the half blindingly bright, half brownish-reddish moon.
“I didn’t know you were so interested in astronomy,” my husband said.
Psht. ...
Why Isn't Step Stool One Word?
Last night I was treated to my husband falling asleep before me. I don’t care how many times he tells me it’s weird that I like to look at him when he sleeps. He’s bigger than me, smarter than me, has a job, and can reach things I can’t without a step stool. But when he falls asleep beside me and he’s so peaceful and vulnerable, it makes me feel like his protector....
This Is A Long Story
At the start of the summer between first grade and second, I got into my parents’ car parked in front of our semi-attached house in Brooklyn and took a ride to our bungalow upstate. At the end of the summer, we were piled into the car and taken to our new home in the suburbs. My cousins who lived in the same town for years came over and we all rolled down the hill in the backyard over and...
The Last Sentence is Meant to be Read With a...
A while back I thought about keeping a food journal, just a small notebook where I could jot down which of my friends or guests liked which dish or dessert. This way, the next time I’d host them, I’d know which staples to make again and what direction to take the menu in. Then I forgot and then when I remembered I got lazy. But somehow my Bubby (whom I share with 70 other...
Chanukah Half Time Report
On Wednesday night my husband lit one candle for the first night of Chanukah and we gave each other gifts. On Thursday night my husband lit two candles for the second night of Chanukah and I made potato and sweet potato latkes for my immediate family who came over for a small get together where we gave each other gifts and my brother tried stealing our dreidels. On Friday night my husband,...
Sliding Pond!
I want to go on a sliding pond for grown ups. I also want to know how long I have to live in the Bronx for my accent to become Bronxy. I only lived in Brooklyn from ages 0-6 and my speech pattern probably most closely resembles Brooklynese (although Brooklynites make fun of some of my words too, so maybe not. Maybe it’s an amalgamation of my parents’ and grandparents’...
November 2010
7 posts
What? I'm unemployed!
It just so happens to be that today when I was walking into the building with groceries the doorman said to me, “you buy a lot of groceries. Do you cook a lot?” Now to fill you in on a little background, my grocery purchasing is something of a sticking point in our relationship because every time I walk into the building with my shopping bags, he asks if I need help. The walk from...
Zaide's Yahrzeit
Today was my Zaide’s yahrzeit (anniversary of his death). So here’s a little story about him. In 1932 my Zaide and his class were all having their 13th birthdays—becoming “bar mitzvahs”. So to celebrate this momentous time in the boys’ lives, the yeshiva took them to visit one of the holiest men of the century—the Chofetz Chaim.
The Chofetz Chaim was...
:)
I was standing in my small apartment kitchen, pouring water into my coffee when I heard my husband’s keys scratching the lock. He was coming home after a night shift at Jacobi’s ER roughly thirty minutes after I had woken up. I stirred my coffee as he passed me to strip off his “gross hospital clothes.”
“Someone is alive because of me!” he announced and I realized I hadn’t even had the chance...
?
Who am I
I Made Food
Every day I open this window, blank on what to write, and close it again a couple hours later. I don’t like that I keep doing that so this week I’m going to break this bad habit and just write something every day. For example, today I made a Bechamel Sauce with Mushrooms, Onions, and Radicchio loosely based on a recipe from one of my cookbooks. It tastes amazing but my husband...
October 2010
6 posts
She Loves Me Like the Rock of Ages
“That’s a terrible thing to say.” “No, you’re not like the rock. My love is like the rock. So I love you like a rock. Solid, unchanging, and impossible to break unless you have a piece of paper.” “I actually knew that was coming.”
Singing Along to Only the Good Die Young
“While you were counting on your rosary.” “What did I say?” “While you were counting on your [mumblemumblemumble]” “I was just testing you. I know what I said, I just wanted to know if it sounded like a word.”
Buy My Cookies →
Vanilla Latte Bakery Coming Soon to Etsy!
“Why is there a lamp on top of the fridge?” my husband called from the kitchen. “For my photoshoot. Well, for the cookies photoshoot.” “…At first I thought that was a joke, but now I realize of course you mean that.”
Yay! Icicle Toes!
I love the time between when New York City gets cold and apartment buildings decide to turn on their heat. Those goosebumps on my arms? Excitement that that time is here.
September 2010
11 posts
I Like It A Lot!
It’s our second monthiversary! Well how do you like that?
Until Edited Or Something
Chapter One of the novel I just started is done. Here’s the first line: On a Tuesday afternoon in the middle of September our door buzzed.
H is for Hot, U is for Unique, N is for Nice, and...
Does anyone still use the word hunk? It’s such a great word that it is now officially back. I will use it in such sentences as, “you look so cute.” “Why do you always think I’m cute when I brush my teeth?” “Oh, do I always say that then…I guess it’s because you’re such a hunk.” Or, “It’s time to wake up. I got you...
Also, Because Queens and Staten Island Are Gross
I lived in Brooklyn from 1985-1992. I lived in Manhattan from 2008-2010. Now I live in the Bronx. 3/5 boroughs ain’t bad.
Because It's Nice
There’s a picture of my mother on her wedding day sitting on the floor, her white dress swirled all around her. At the edge of her gown lies her bouquet. I stole the proof out of the proofs album she hid at the top of my brother’s closet. It slid out of my bag as I was getting ready to leave home today and my mother gave me a look.
“Don’t worry,” I told her,...
I Like to Read Through My Drafts Sometimes.
My life used to be in my blog, back when I used blogspot. I could read through all my posts and see vignettes from my life. Now my life is in my drafts list on Tumblr. I don’t want people to know my very inner thoughts, my insecurities, or my delicate happinesses anymore and I wonder if that’s why people write fiction.
We cross the street holding hands and when we get to the other side you say, “I love you.” In the middle of the sidewalk on a Sunday afternoon you love me and I realize I’ve been holding my breath.
Rosh Hashana!
My favorite holiday begins tonight and with it starts the new year. To a year filled with health, happiness, and success! (And lots of healthy babies…)
Barbra Streisand Because I Love Her
I love Glee and I’m excited about its return after the summer. But here’s the thing I can’t stand—I can’t stand when the producers or directors talk about how Lea Michelle is the next Barbra Streisand. She’s not. She has a beautiful voice and very good acting talent, but her voice is flatter than Barbra’s and her acting isn’t as convincing as...
He's Crafty (Get It? Like Arts and Crafts...)
Yesterday I visited my cousin and her adorable three year old son. “Look at his legs,” she said. It was an easy task since he was wearing shorts. I looked back at my cousin, knowing she doesn’t abuse her son, and asked why he had so many bruise lines going across his legs, like someone had tied his legs down. “Now look at his legs closely,” she said. I flipped...
August 2010
6 posts
Or This Could Mean I Need a Job
Made croutons tonight. The conversation with my husband earlier today went like this: “Are there any kinds of salads that you do like or will eat?” “Yeah. Those kinds with all the other stuff in them. Like those taco salads, or—” “Ones with deli meat?” “Yeah.” “So you like something potentially healthy only when it’s made...
Probably Both
I stepped into Dunkin Donuts while doing some grocery shopping nearby. “Do you take these?” I asked the guy behind the counter, handing him my “Buy 5 Coffees, Get the 6th One Free” card that had two punches in it. “Hmm,” he said and read the stores on the back that did. “No,” was his conclusion as he reached under the counter to produce a...
July 2010
5 posts
It's Possible that Someone's on the Verge of...
My mother and I went to the new apartment today to set some of my stuff up. When we were ready to leave, I got a text from my fiance (who I am traditionally not seeing this week until the wedding): “Don’t leave yet.” This was followed by another text: “If someone knocks on the door, hide in the bedroom.” Sure enough, moments later, there was a knock at the door. I...
Great Story
Here’s the context: This Thursday, my mother is making a wedding. She and I have both been waking up at too-early hours. Me from nerves, her from stress. Tomorrow morning, my brother will arrive in New York at 5am, just in time to sleep all day and be rested by the day of the wedding.
Here’s what happened: 2:30am the phone rings. My mother answers: “Hello?” ...
This Was Very Sad
Yesterday my mother helped me bury the two baby birds we found dead on our driveway. Their nest, which was lying alongside them, must’ve fallen from one of the trees that line the driveway. Poor little things barely even had any feathers.
"When Are You Getting Married?"
My 16 year old brother is at a traveling camp this summer. They started in Paris, stopped off in Switzerland, and visited a few cities in Italy before heading to Israel for the last couple weeks of the camp. When sending him off, my mother said to him, “you are to drink a lot, wear sunscreen, and take good care of yourself. You are coming home the day before Dina’s wedding and I...